I dont know what to do or why she would do this and im ****ed up right now?

Wow...you write a lot lol. Ok this is a lot to take in but based on my judgement, i think that in her mid, you guys had a great FRIEND relationship thriving at one point in time. then, one day, she gets emails saying you love her and you eventually confirm it. So i think it was too sudden of a change for her. You cant go from best friends to boyfriend girlfriend in a short period of time. Okay, this is harsh but the truth hurts. If she wanted to talk to you about this, she would've responded. She's not responding, so i don' think she wants to talk about this anymore. To her, i don't think there was ever anything there, so if i were you. I would still be her friend. Cut down on the calls and emails like send 1/3 of what you're doing now. Next time you see her, act very friendly and compliment a lot. Maybe you could be friends and pick up where you left off. Maybe it will turn into a relationship, maybe it won't but for now, give the girl some space and if she wants to be your friend, be thankful for that.